The Miraculous Adventures of Kittenboy
by kittenboyadventures
Summary: This is what happens when Anna and ADY stays on skype until 4 am. Kittenboy might just be the cutest superhero known to mankind (and cats). He's always there to save the day, but what happens when another superhero comes into his territory..? And who IS Captain Butterfly? Superhero-AU, Klaine and a lot of cuteness.


Once upon a time, in the faraway land of McKinley High School, lived a young boy. He was not very tall, had meticulously gelled hair and was never seen without a bow tie around his neck. And they called him Kittenboy.

Kittenboy was cool. He had made it his mission to banish all the disastrous, day to day evils of McKinley for the sake of humans and cats alike, and all the students (and their cats) simply adored him. With his neverending courage and green tights, Kittenboy made sure that no student harmed themselves in gym class and that no milk was spilt in the cafeteria. Whenever an item was lost, Kittenboy had an uncanny ability to find it and always got it to the lost and found department before the owner even had a chance to panic. And at the end of each school day, Kittenboy visited all the classroom to be certain no leftover light was contaminating the environment with it's unforgivable waste of energy. Whenever something bad was about to happen, one could be sure that Kittenboy would show.

Kittenboy was, to put it simply, your friendly, neighborhood, everyday superhero. With fantastic hair.

"And he's _so_ dreamy," Quinn sighed happily.

"I've got to admit that the boy has a certain charm," Santana agreed reluctantly, "and I'm not usually one for fangirling."

Blaine Anderson, who certainly was _not_ one for meaningless worship, thank you very much, rolled his eyes at the girls stupidity.

"I don't see what all the fuss is about, he's just an attention-seeking nobody prancing around in a ridiculous outfit, with cat ears!"

"But he's heroic!" Quinn protested angrily. "Yesterday, he caught my math books just as they were about to fall out of my locker. And I have _two_ math books. I would have had to pick them _both_ up from the floor!"

"It sounds epic," Santana agreed seriously. "That's Kittenboy for you, he's just like Jesus. Except he's got neon green tights and an immense amount of hair gel."

"And stupid cat ears," Blaine muttered.

Santana's eyes narrowed.

"Well, your hair looks like a sheep just barfed on it so it totally makes sense that you're jealous, Anderson," she retorted coldly. "You wouldn't recognise heroism even if it sat on your face."

"Attention all students!" Sue roared at the front of the class. "We're about to begin this dreary lesson which your useless little brains will hardly remember once the week is out, so get your pathetic asses into those chairs and shut up."

As people were hurrying to their seats, Blaine turned away from Quinn and Santana with a secret but satisfied smile.

There was a tentative knock on the door and a boy dressed in a powder blue poncho peeked inside the classroom. Everyone, including Sue, turned to look at him.

"Ah, you." Sue exclaimed. "Students, this boy, who apparently has no sense of color coordination, is your new classmate. His name is Porcelain."

"Actually, my name is Kurt Hummel," the boy said tentatively.

"Yeah, whatever, sit down," Sue barked. "Now, midgets. Turn to page 394."

Blaine opened the book to the assigned page, but didn't start reading. Instead he fixed his eyes on the new boy, Kurt. He found Kurt's choice of colours very intriguing.

"Sue has an unusual sense of humour considering that it's never actually funny."

Kurt Hummel looked up to see a boy standing by his table in the cafeteria. He vaguely recognized him from his first class that day. Or at least he recognized the boy's unruly raven hair.

"I noticed," said Kurt. "I've never had my skintone compared to a doll before."

The boy smiled.

"I can sort of see her point," he said casually, taking the seat opposite Kurt. "You do have a very fair complexion."

Kurt was positive that he was blushing.

"I don't think I caught your name," he told the boy curiously.

"Well, that's 'cause I never told you," the boy winked at Kurt. "It's Blaine, Blaine Anderson."

"Blaine, I like it." Kurt said and fired a big smile towards Blaine.

The next morning marked the end of the world as Blaine knew it. Everything was topsy-turvy. And insane.

There were flower pots in the hallways. And in the cafeteria. And in people's lockers. And in the gym. And in Sue Sylvester's office. There were even flowers on the rooftop.

"What's going on?" Blaine wondered wearily, already feeling his allergy starting to wake from a long sleep.

"There's a brand new superboy in town, that's what," Santana replied with a grin.

"And he's fabulous!" Quinn squealed excitedly. "He's got pale white skin and a dazzling smile and graceful wings!"

"Wings?"

"Well, duh, he's Captain Butterfly," Santana snorted. "He does whatever a butterfly does. Well, except fly."

"Then what _does_ he do?" Blaine felt dumbfounded and it didn't help that his nose threatened to itch and his eyes were starting to burn.

"He smiles and brings everyone flowers," Quinn told him eagerly. "It's like happiness in a vase!"

"And also sex on legs," Santana pointed out. "Except he's all over my gaydar."

"He seems even lamer than Kittenboy," Blaine concluded.

Quinn and Santana just shook their heads at him.

"Nevermind Kittenboy, Captain Butterfly is the new hero of McKinley," Quinn informed matter-of-factly as the girls turned and started to walk to class.

"So what d'you say about Captain Butterfly's hair?" Blaine heard Santana ask. "Pretty awesome if you ask me."

Blaine's already foul mood turned even worse as he went to his class with an increasingly itching nose. The huge vase of flowers on the teacher's desk didn't exactly help. Neither did the roses on every single cafeteria table.

"You okay?" Kurt wondered hesitantly as Blaine sunk into the chair beside him.

"No," Blaine replied honestly. "Seeing you here is kind of the only good thing that's happened to me today."

Kurt smiled.

"I really, really hate flowers," Blaine continued with annoyance, "and for some reason, they are everywhere!"

"I think that's Captain Butterfly's doing," Kurt said, for some reason averting his eyes from Blaine's. "Totally his fault, I mean. Noone else to blame. Certainly not me."

"I don't think I like him," Blaine muttered.

"Why do you hate flowers anyway?" Kurt wondered, looking genuinely confused. "I honestly can't imagine anyone hating flowers."

"Allergy," Blaine replied simply, sniffling.

"Oh," Kurt said, for some reason looking troubled. "I forgot!"

"Forgot what?" Blaine felt puzzled.

"Just, uh, something in my locker," Kurt said, hastily getting to his feet. "Gotta run, sorry!"

By the end of the day, Blaine had had enough.

Kittenboy walked slowly through the empty hallways of McKinley. He was aware that his task was going to be a thankless job, but somebody had to do it. Somebody had to save the school from the evils of flower insanity. Save the school, again.

Yet even though his nose was itching worse than ever and his eyes felt as if they were about to burn up, he couldn't quite bring himself to do the flowers any harm. After all, they were awfully pretty. And his superhero name was Kittenboy, for god's sake. He couldn't just go around demolishing flowers. It wasn't the right thing to do, and Kittenboy always did the right thing.

Instead, Kittenboy made it his mission to move every single one of the offending plants far away from students and cats alike. After careful deliberation, he chose the roof. The flowers would have both sunshine, rainwater and be at a safe distance from everyone else.

As Kittenboy begun carrying the pots and vases, he did notice that they seemed to have decreased in numbers. He couldn't say for sure, though, and didn't think too much about it. At least not until he caught sight of another, vase-carrying figure up on the roof.

A figure with elegant, transparent wings.

"You!" Kittenboy shouted angrily.

Captain Butterfly stopped in his tracks, looking over towards Kittenboy. Kittenboy wanted to march over to him immediately and tell him off for his insensitive deeds. But first he paused, taking his time to carefully put down the vase he was carrying. Then he launched forwards.

"Of all the weak attempts at heroism I've witnessed, yours is by far the lamest," he told Captain Butterfly sharply.

"Says the boy with cat ears," Captain Butterfly countered calmly, his expression almost amused.

"_Kitten ears!_" Kittenboy stomped his foot angrily.

Captain Butterfly suddenly sneezed.

Both of them started to walk closer and closer until they stood right before each other.

"Who are you to come to McKinley, to my territory, and just waltz in with your unheroic whims," Kittenboy questioned with a cold glare.

"Who am I? Who are you to tell me where I can and can not put my gorgeous flowers?"

Captain Butterfly looked mad and before Kittenboy had the opportunity to react, Captain Butterfly had struck his hand out and grabbed Kittenboy's mask, tearing it off. Kittenboy stumbled backwards, trying to cover his face, yet it was too late. Captain Butterfly was staring at him, open mouthed, looking simply stunned.

"Oh," he said quietly.

Kittenboy, who was no longer Kittenboy but simply Blaine, turned from furious with rage to quite miserable.

"You bitch," he spit out. "Of all the evil acts of this world, this one is just unforgivable! And _mean_." His lower lip started to twitch.

"Well, I didn't mean to… Hey, wait, don't go!"

Captain Butterfly quickly caught up with Blaine, who had already turned to walk away, and took hold of his shoulder. Blaine immediately tried to shake himself free.

"Just leave me alone," he said coldly. "Take your stupid flowers and go back to where you came from."

"No," Captain Butterfly said firmly. "Not until you know who I really am, too."

With a swift movement, Captain Butterfly reached up and pulled off his own mask.

Blaine Anderson met Kurt Hummel's eyes with astonishment.

"But… how… what?" Blaine stammered eloquently.

"I only tried to make people happy," Kurt said quietly.

"Well," Blaine said, desperately trying to think clearly. "You sort of did. Just not me."

"I did intend to carry all those flowers up here, though," Kurt assured him hurriedly, taking a step back. "And I won't disturb you from now on. I'll leave you alone in class. And at lunch."

"No!" Blaine exclaimed loudly. "I like you, just not your flowers, they make my nose itch."

Kurt smiled slightly at that. Hopefully.

"Actually, I'm allergic to cats," he told Blaine. "So we're sort of even, if you think about it."

Blaine reached out tentatively, taking a shy hold of Kurt's hand. Kurt's smile widened.

They left the roof together.

FIN

* * *

_A/N: So, we were tired and it was late and this just sort of happened to come out. It was really fun to write a story together with someone. Especially when you think alike. I hope you like it, we'd be very happy if you wanted to leave a comment! /ADY_


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